Leaves

How do you feel about leaves?

It is fall and I have seen many different re-actions regarding leaves. My husband and most of our neighbors are piling them up to haul off to the dump and get them out of the area. To them, leaves seem to be a nuisance but what are leaves, really?

A leaf is the manufacturing area for all plants. It is what feeds this plant and keeps it healthy. They come in all shapes and sizes and for the most part, they have some differences yet look very much alike. Most people see them as all the same. They have the ability to combine the moisture and minerals found in the ground and hauled up to where; with the sunlight, they can create all the things that the plant needs to survive.

I remember taking a sensitivity class once and we were asked to hold a leaf in our hands. Then we were told to closed our eyes and travel inside the leaf that we were holding. Before doing this we had done it with a small block of silver and a few other things like a block of copper. While in the silver block, I remember when I said "Hello" it echoed all over the place but when I did this same thing in the leaf, there was no echo. In fact the sound was very muted. I found myself between the bottom of the leaf and its top. I could wander around in a catacomb of large cells that were very hollow. The light filtering through was a muted yellow-green. It was a very comfortable place to be. It reminded me of being in a forest with green all around and not being able to see anything else.

The leaves in my yard today come from a lot of different plants. These plants have all stored their food in their roots for the winter and dropping these leaves.

Today's problem stems from the fact that I think these leaves should be left on my gardens and most people think these leaves should be hauled off.

Today I took a rake and borrowed some leaves from my neighbors to cover the areas where the plants had already gone down.

The Hosta leaves died back and have been put into the pile of stuff headed for the dump but for some reason, I want some maple leaves covering the bare ground where these roots are sleeping. I want to tuck them in for the winter with Grandma Maple's quilt of different colored leaves for their winter's sleep.

I know that this will mean more work in the spring to uncover them but it is important to me. In the spring we all feel great about things coming alive again so it isn't a problem to take the "quilts" off the beds and watch the new plants coming up.

I borrowed leaves to cover the St. John's Wort that has a small rosette of green at the base of this year's growth, which has been cut down already. I borrowed leaves to cover the Ginseng plants and I will have more than enough time to clean that off next spring as Ginseng is a very lazy plant. She likes to sleep late and won't wake up until the trees have enough shade for her. I borrowed leaves to cover the two Goldenseal roots that I planted lately, that were sent to me by my cousin from a plant rescue group. I borrowed leaves to cover the Black Cohosh and the Blue Cohosh with her vibrant blue berries still on the dead stocks. There were other things that I covered because I wanted to give them a head start and maybe this is wrong but when I covered the peppermint, I could feel them snuggling down for the winter.

There were some plants that didn't need a "Quilt" but this year I had planted two Russian pink lilacs and as they are really small yet, I decided to tuck a "Quilt" around their base.

I admire the hardy plants but we all need some attention from time to time so if these plants ask me …. What a silly thing to say, as they usually don't ask when they want something, they scream at me. Sometimes I try to explain why this person got this and you didn't but for the most part, they are very understanding.

I have a few that I need to talk to yet; Garden Sage and the Roses need to be talked to. They struggle through the winter and do it very well. I will probably cover the roses with evergreen branches.

Leaves to me are the frosting on the cake. They are there for a reason and not just to be taken to the dump. One year using an edger, the kind with the plastic line that whips off plants that are not wanted in an area; along with a plastic garbage can; I pulverized and dumped them on my gardens. That was a lot of work. I also used to have a compost pile but haven't for a while as we don't have a space for it now.

Do you have some nice leaf memories too? Remember when we raked leaves into a pile and jumped in, laughing and giggling. My husband's nice memory is the smell of burning leaves. To him it was the smell of fall. I love to watch individual leaves blowing across the road as I am driving. I love when I am walking through leaves and hear the crunch mostly because I am shuffling instead of walking just to hear the sound.

Isn't it amazing that each plant, no matter how small it is, is loaded with leaves?

Above my fireplace is a collage of leaves that I found three years ago and pressed. Then pasted them to acid-free paper and framed it. The fall leaves have already lost their chlorophyll so they don't loose their color as quickly as green leaves do.

Leaves are so much more than what we think they are. They decorate our world with different colors at different times and some can even make you smile. That first yellow/green that peeks through in the spring, will lighten any heart. That yellow/red/orange that hangs on the branch in the fall will brighten any day.

As Martha Stewart would put it, "Leaves are a good thing."

Animal Abuse

Animal Abuse

"Why would anyone harm an animal?" was the question posed by my husband tonight. The answer is faulty education.

We have been taught that we are THE PEOPLE of this planet; everything else is subservient to us. This is everything; other races, other religions, other countries, it includes plants and animals. How many times have you heard, "it is only a cat or only a tree?" We have been taught that WE are the only things on this planet that matter.

I do believe that we are making some head way in this educational process as only 100 years ago, and this is not a very long time in regard to history, people talked about the black person as being an animal. They were beings to be use and owned. We still have a long way to go but we are making progress and it is my belief that one day, all beings will be recognized as being a part of the Earth family.

It has always amazed me that a white blond lady will hug and cuddle an all black poodle but to hug a black person who has been helpful would be out of the question.

Tonight I overheard the 60 Minutes program talking about a Horse Whisper. That is a person who can communicate with horses. All beings try to communicate with humans but we have not allowed that as even a possibility until lately.

Why have we been taught that we are the superior race on this planet? In many holy books the early writers felt alone and needed to have this feeling that they were the chosen ones and God spoke to them and through them. Why would a creator favor one species over another? Do you love one of your children more than any of the others?

As a person who believes in reincarnation, I know that I have been many things. I have been many races and belonged to many religions. There is no, "I'm better than you are" any where in this universe. We have been trained to think this.

Look at the educational system. I am better because I am getting better grades than you are. But what are you learning? You are learning what they want you to know? Are you learning to think? Even some of the books we are learning from are loaded with miss information. I was trained to think that we were the super power in WWII but I am learning that the Germans were taken down by the Russians with more force than the USA put out there and for a longer time. Is that in the history books?

Look at entertainment. What is the goal of a ball game? A game show on TV? It is always to find the better person/team. The one that has ingested more facts and can regurgitate on demand, the winner. We think that person is really smart but can he think?

Does he understand the thought processes of a tree? Does he want to understand what the cat is saying? I have a friend who tells me what my cat is telling her about his condition as the cat sees it. I know more about my physical condition than the doctor who spends 15minutes with me? The cat is usually right and I can take it from there and find a way to correct the condition.

Are humans slow learners? Can we be taught to respect things other than ourselves? Is it possible that we are here to learn to co-create on this planet? Who is teaching us this? I don't hear about it from religions. I don't hear about it from schools. I don't hear it from Governments. Who will teach us this or do we learn it by trial and error?

We don't have to agree with others but we do need to respect their view points and that brings us back to; why do people harm animals? Maybe it is all a misunderstanding? Did that animal hurt you for some unknown reason? Perhaps if you understood his language, you might try to figure out what you did to upset him. Maybe he was hurting? Maybe he was just doing his job? Think? Would any of these ideas come to mind?

I have seen the footage that my husband was watching when he asked that question and it is well done. It was designed to hurt your feelings. We learn best with pain. When you touch the stove and burn your fingers, you're more careful. If they can get you to feel, they have taught you something.

We are learning about this planet but it takes us a very long time. We think that we learned all we are going to learn in school but that isn't so. This planet of free will was created to teach us. Every generation is learning bit by bit. Someday we will be the people we want to be. Evolution is a slow process but we are making headway, one day at a time. What you do and what I do makes the difference in where we are headed.

Challenges Create Character

Once upon a time, is how all good stories start so let's start this one that way.

Somewhere in my memories are thoughts about hard times. How about having to leave the library table that Grandmother brought from Norway behind so that the weight of the wagon isn't too hard to get up the mountain side? Or how about not having enough water for everyone and having to shoot the worst of the horses so that the rest could make it? Maybe wondering what to feed everyone when everything was used up? Burdock root soup again? Going through wooded areas where the trees were so dense that we couldn't find enough grass to feed the stock and had to kill the cow to keep the horses alive. The first major river took the books that I liked. Having to go the last 200 miles on foot and getting to the point that you didn't care if you made it or not? The dishes that were given to us for a wedding gift were traded for salt about 500 miles back.

Life is full of things like that. I think everyone that I know has done it, maybe not in this lifetime but they have.

It is hard holding onto a goal that gets to feel like it isn't worth the effort. And a lot of people did give up on the trail. This life isn't for the weak. You have to be strong to endure.

Do you have these memories? I do. I know about all the lessons that were there. One that I carry is that people are more important than things. I have revisited that lesson many times. Sometimes to my regret when the person you have put faith in decides to give up. They all start out on the voyage with big plans and big expectations but when it doesn't fit the plan that they had, they cave in and need to be carried. I haven't minded carrying someone until they recover and get their feet under them but the ones who feel that they deserve to be carried really bother me.

Life is about struggle. Everyone has to make decisions. Having to figure out a plan B and sometimes it even comes down to Plan Z but we are still trying to work it out. Some settled for much less than they had planned but found that the struggle isn't as hard that way. They had set their goals too high and were forever finding blocks to getting there. After settling for a lesser goal, they were much happier.

When one is finding the way too steep, it is time to scout around and find an easier way up and over. Many times this adds time and miles to our plans but life is a little less challenging.

There will always be things in your path to create blocks to easy access but how you deal with these things determines your character.

Justice is Blindfolded

Once upon a time when God was a lot younger, I divorced the father of my children.

Never having been in court before, I was sure that it was just this side of church and felt that whatever happened would be fair and just.

I was right. The Judge listened to this and to that and then in his wisdom announced that I would need child support to take care of my three children. Now I could see why people hold the justice system up so high and almost revere it. This Judge was indeed a very wise man.

Three months went by and I was expecting some financial help, based on what I had heard in court. Nothing arrived but I continued to do my best to make sure that my children were cared for.

Finally I decided to write to the Judge, this very wise man. I told him that on such and such a date he had given a decision that said I was to receive some financial help with the children. I told him that to date, I had received nothing.

I got a letter from the Judge which stated that "It is the duty of the court…." It was right out of some rule book, perhaps Robert's Rules of Order or the Masonic Order, I wasn't sure but basically the bottom line was that, should I be unhappy with the judgment I should come back into court.

I studied that letter for a long time. What was he really telling me? He really was saying that he had no power to enforce his proclamations. His only power was to tell people to sit down or stand up or pound that gavel for one reason or another. He was not a very powerful person. He wasn't even very wise.

After studying the letter, I made a proclamation myself. Mine was based on being practical and I think I was a bit wiser than the Judge. I decided at that time that the legal system is not based on wisdom but the whim of the people playing that game.

The proclamation that was made that day was not to go back to court but to use the money that I would have used to get another worthless judgment; to pay the dentist, to buy shoes. With kids there is always something and the legal system is based on rules in some book but not on life.

To this day I have seen a lot of very unwise things that are done in the name of Justice. I truly understand why she is blindfolded. I would not want to see what was happening in my name either if this is the way it goes.

Were I to be chosen to be on a jury today, no matter what the person had done, I would vote not guilty. Why don't we vote innocent, why is it not guilty. Perhaps there is no innocence in a court room? I have listened to some things in court and the jury is asked to make a judgment based on less information than I would need to give one of my children permission to go somewhere.

My sister told me about the juries that she has been on and how they always make her cry because she says, "We are deciding a man's life." And they tell her that if she goes along with them, they can go home that day. Then I hear, it is the best system. Is it? When only 2% of the people can get heard on appeal just because some people wanted to go home early.

Wisdom has left the building, Justice close your eyes.

Cub Scouts

What did you do this week?
This week we worked on our pledge and salute and all the things we have to know for the pack meeting next week. We talked about the flag and how it gets displayed with the American flag. We talked about Mrs. G's rules. She has them posted but Johnny and Lenny ran in her house and that is against the rules. It is OK to run in the back yard but not in the house so..Kind of a bummer.

What did you do this week?
We had pieces of rope and learned to make different kinds of knots. It was really fun. When we get home can I show you a square knot?
That would be nice.

What did you do this week?
Remember that permission slip that you signed last night? Well, we all piled into the station wagon and went to the animal shelter. They had all sorts of dogs and cats. There was one dog that really looked so sad that I wanted to bring him home. Can we have a dog someday? They even had puppies and kittens. I saw a black puppy that was so little. We got to hold them in our hands. Then a lady told us about the people that work there. They clean the cages, but it isn't like little cages, they are really big. They walk the dogs outside sometimes and even give them a bath and feed them and everything. It was really neat.

What did you do this week?
First we made a card to send to the animal shelter. Each of us has to write something on it. This card was as big as our kitchen table and we could write really big. We were supposed to thank them for letting us come there and play with the animals.
Then we had a snack and talked about the knots that we learned about. If we could show Mrs. G. how to make three or four knots, then she would sign off on one of the things that we need to toward our Wolf points.

What did you do this week?
Mrs. G. had some bamboo that she cut from a neighbor's yard and we each got one. Then she showed us how to put a cord on it and we made a fishing pole out of it. At the end of the line we tied a magnet with one of our knots. We went into the front yard and were not allowed on the grass because that was water and we had to stand on the sidewalk or the driveway and see if we could catch fish with our magnet. The "water" was full of metal things that we could bring up and catch. Doug got the most "Fish" so he got some marbles. I only caught 8 things but it was fun fishing in her front yard. Then we had snacks.

What did you do this week?
I can't tell you because we are making a present but we really worked hard today. Whoever wasn't working on their project was at the table making a card to go with their present. We had a nice talk when we had snacks. Lenny told us that he gave Maria a ring this week. I don't think that is really a good thing but Lenny said that his big brothers do it all the time and Lenny really likes Maria.

What did you do this week?
Wow! Look, I won the marbles today. When we got there the whole back yard was full of string. I mean that there was yarn all over the place even in the tree and around the swing set. Just every where. Each of us got a different colored ball to wind up the yarn. Mine was Blue. When Mrs. G. said "go" we started winding it up and sometimes we had to throw our balls over branches and stuff. One time I had to untwist mine with Billy's red yarn. This took a long time but it was really fun. When we got it all wound up, the first one back got a bag of marbles. This time I won. That was really fun. I am really fast.

What did you do this week?
Mrs. G. said that because we all had gotten our knot arrow points, we were going to work on another point toward our wolf badge. So we each had to sew a button on a piece of material. Bobby stuck the needle in his finger and it started to bleed all over the place but it stopped and he got a bandaide. After we got the button on, we had to sew two pieces of material together. They really didn't look very good but if Mrs. G. couldn't pull them apart. We got credit. We talked about why sewing is important, like making a tent with material and fixing clothes. I don't know if we will have to make things like that but we did it.

What did you do this week?
We all walked around the whole tract of houses and picked up junk. There was a little area that was full of small trees and bushes. It had so much paper and even bottles in there. We spent a lot of time cleaning that up and even put a sign on a bush saying that it was cleaned by Den 4. We went back for our snacks and we talked about community service. How important it is to clean our neighborhoods. If we do this sometime this week and you sign this note that I did, then I get credit for it in community service. I can do that on Saturday, if that is OK?

What did you do this week?
We are writing a puppet show for the pack meeting next month. We are all going to be sock puppets and we had to decide what we wanted to say. Mrs. G said that it was our puppet show so she was only there to assist. We came up with a really funny show and next week we will make our puppets. Lenny wanted to be a bear but Bobby already was one. Mrs. G. said that there could be two bears if the show called for it. I decided that I would be a wolf. I have to find pictures of wolves before next week so I can make my puppet.

What did you do this week?
It was so dumb, we all made puppets and we are all bears. I didn't want to be a bear but that is how it turned out. Billy was upset because his puppet didn't look very nice. We sewed buttons on for eyes and glued some yarn for hair all over and then we had to read the story that we wrote but we changed it a lot from last week. I guess it will be OK. It is kind'a a dumb show but we are going to do it anyway.

What did you do this week?
We talked about how ever one liked out show and that we were proud to do it. We also talked about the money stuff that was mentioned at the Pack meeting. Most of us got out community service arrow points but Lenny didn't so we thought maybe we could all help him out. They want us to collect newspapers and bring them to the next meeting. Mrs. G said that she would store them until the Pack meetin and if Lenny would bring a bundle of papers in, she thought that would be the rest of his community service points. I think they get money for the papers?

What did you do this week?
See what I made this week. We worked in Mrs. G's kitchen making cookies. We mixed everything up and then rolled it out and everyone got to use the cookie cutters to make a different shapes. I made cookies that look like a man and I also made a few turkeys and even a couple of stars. Then we baked them and brought them out to cool. We had some juice and then came back and decorated them. I brought the two man cookies home for you to see. I ate the stars and we decided to save some of them for next week. Mrs. G. said that this would be applied to our cooking points but that we need to make some stuff at home and you have to sign this slip saying that I did. It can be sandwiches or something. She suggested that we help with dinner a few times.

What did you do this week?
We had some more kids join our group. Some Den mother quit and Mrs. G. said that they could join our group. I know Randy and Donny from school but Dean must go to another school somewhere or maybe he is new at our school. Anyway, we just sat there and one of us had to read the rules so that the new people would know them. It was boring. We did get to eat the rest of the cookies from last week. We talked about going to the fly-in if our parents will let us. I need you to sign this slip so I can go. We might even ride in an airplane if you OK it. Please,please say that you will.

What did you do this week?
We went to the airport and climbed through a lot of airplanes. Dean's mother went with us and she is really nice. They had rides for kids at a penny a pound and each person whose parents signed was allowed to go up. It was really fun. Mrs. G and Dean's mother didn't fly because they stayed with whoever wasn't in the plane. Only three of us could go at a time. It was really neat. Some of the planes are so big. Some of them could hold this car. That was really fun.

What did you do this week?
Remember when we made those shoe scrapers out of wood and bottle tops? Well, today we talked about tools and I think Dean's Dad must do a lot of woodworking because Dean knew a lot of the different tools that we had to name. We talked about keeping them clean and sharp and how to use them. Mrs. G. said that with our project and today, we will be able to get another point at the Pack meeting.

What did you do this week?
We talked about collecting things. I told them about my rocks and Billy has a collection of matchbox cars. We can bring these things in and talk about them another time. Lenny has a box of things but I don't know if that is a collection. What do you think a collection is? Dad, do you have a collection of anything?

What did you do this week?
We talked about camping out in Mrs. G's back yard. She is going to get some tents and then we can spend a night out there. We need to have a sleeping bag and a flashlight. Do we have a flash light that I can take?
I got to bandage Donny up today. Everyone had to work on someone else. We talked about what to do about cuts and putting bandages on someone. We even used out neck scarves to do this. Did you know that you can keep from getting colds just by washing your hands a lot? Can you help me write a fire drill for our house so I can bring it next meeting?

What did you do this week?
We had fun at Cub Scouts.

Good Morning

Today was the day to head for the library to take an already read book back and get a couple of new ones. I was looking forward to checking out The Girl With No Shadow, a sequel to the hit movie CHOCOLAT.

After having breakfast and getting me put together, I got on my bike and headed out. The day was in the high 60s and so comfortable, just right for biking.

I got less than a block from my home when I met another biker who called out to me, Good Morning. For some reason this hit me as being unusually friendly. I don't remember people calling out, Good Morning to me. It was a good morning so I soaked the words into my whole being.

How come these words were so powerful on this very morning? Why did they seem to transform my being? How come that I am not used to them?

Traveling on, I met walkers coming from the direction that I was headed. Some of them had head phones on, listening to something on their radios. They just smiled, maybe one might nod in my direction. (Do you think that they saw the transformation the "Good Morning" had made?)

Then I met an elderly man who looked in my direction and said, "Good Morning." I returned the greeting and pedaled on. Now I was saying Good Morning. Wow, this stuff was catching. I usually just say, Hi when I am riding my bike to the post office or the library but today I was infected with a "Good Morning."

Why was this day different from other days? Yes, it was a delightful day. The sun was out but it wasn't overly warm and the wind wasn't blowing. Everything was just right.

Then it hit me. I usually run my errands later in the day. No one ever says, "Good Afternoon."
They might say something like, "Beautiful day" or "nice weather" but never "Good Afternoon".

As a rule, I am not an early person. Today was very different.

Sometimes we need to vary what we do in life just to experience something different. When we do this, magic can happen in our lives. We can see and hear things that we haven't before or at least not for a very long time.

Life is full of wonderful moments that sparkle.

Hurting and Anger

Why is anger such a hard thing to deal with? One would think at my age, I would have a handle on how to deal with anger but I haven't. How do other people deal with it? I see people who swallow it and move ahead. Other people start habits that are detrimental to their health such as drinking or smoking. I lash out with words or cry, sometimes both.

Life isn't always fair but when one knows that they have been treated badly intentionally, what can one do?

One would think that I would have worked out a way to deal with this by now. I wish that I could say that I dive into a book to get lost in the words or smash glass bottles in my garage but when one is hurting from games that others are playing, what can one really do?

My son has been angry for 8 years and I can completely relate to his anger. When someone tells him to "cool it", they don't feel his anger. They don't know how the whole inside of him is hurting because of the unfairness of it all.

I have to admit that my latest hurt has only lasted four months but I can't seem to stop being angry at the person who inflicted this.

Looking at what my son has had to go through from my new perspective, I can see why he can't let go of any of his anger. I am having trouble letting go of mine.

Do people know when they are causing this much hurt and do they do this on purpose? From here I would say the answer to this is both yes and no. As in my son's case, they knew what they were doing; they just needed to throw their weight around… Hey, that is just what my thing is about too. This man decided to play games with me; he didn't care how I was feeling.

Over the course of the years people have hurt my feelings and it has taken me a while to get over the hurt. Most of the time I go from hurting to hating. Even today I have a hurt that was done a long time ago and although this person thinks we are friends, I can't be his friend. Maybe they don't mean to hurt us. Maybe they think that if they do it quickly, we will get over it faster? I have heard that one and it doesn't hurt any less.

The hurt that I am experiencing today is due to the fact that I was trying to handle a problem and I got stonewalled. That isn't a problem. I continued to work on this and the person that was creating this problem continued to tell me that it couldn't be done but after months of trying to work this out myself, I ask my husband to deal with this and it gets handled that day. That is the hurt! Why couldn't this have been done months ago when I was trying to work this out? Why did it take a man to deal with it? Why as a woman, I wasn't good enough to work this out? That hurts so much and it is just ego but it still hurts.

When my son's stuff gets settled and it will, what will it take to find out all the things that the system did wrong and clear this man of something he never did? How long will he hurt? Will this… no,it will be a part of his life for the rest of his life. He will feel this anger and hurt for the rest of his natural life. I never knew how to get rid of anger so how could I teach him.

I know they have classes on anger management. They must have ways to get this out of one's life so it doesn't impinge on all the rest of it but from here, I haven't figured out how to do this. My usual method is to distance myself from what caused the upset.

Let's look at the other side of anger. I know that I have angered others. How have they dealt with it? I guess some have tried to hurt me back in one way or another. Some have distanced themselves from me. Some try to worm their way back and some just put on a good front when we have to interact.

Have you heard about forgiving them? I have heard of this. What does it mean to forgive someone who has hurt you so much that you feel like you will never be the same? Can you forgive someone who has changed the whole course of your life to something that you never thought it would be? How does this work? I say, "I forgive you" and that makes everything better? Then why doesn't that heavy hurting place in my body stop hurting? Where can I put that? Is it possible to make it get smaller so that one doesn't notice it all the time?

I guess I have a lot to learn yet. Maybe I will live to be 80 because I seem to be a slow learner.